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Rainy Days, Mornings and Middling Always Get Me Down

December 11th, 2008

Now I know my post title isn’t faithful to the Carpenters song, but maybe they should have been more specific because Rainy Days and Mondays just doesn’t cut it for me. I think this might be my first post of a personal nature, but the feeling is palpable this morning. The term is Seasonal Affective Disorder, and by chance the acronym describes the effects of weather on someones mood. Someone like myself. The weather is drab. In the New York it would be snowing or at least the aftereffects of a recent white, fluffy deluge would be sprinkled all around. Not the case in DC.

I awoke to nuclear winter-esque drabness, with sprinklings of fallout rain. Completely overcast, in the 50’s with a light breeze and just enough of a drizzle to make you use your umbrella but all the while question if it’s deployment is truly necessary. I should be in bed, my wonderful warm bed. Of course, a little overcast and rain doesn’t really get to me - I did grow up in England after all. However, walking in the building it seems everyone is a little more down than usual. The security guard, whom I’ve helped with Pre-Calc homework and as a result established a nice rapport, was definitely more sullen than usual. Then the receptionist, who is admittedly not a morning person but offers the routine morning salutation, is strangely silent. And finally to the teacher, the one that is always so perky in the morning, yeah, that one…stares straight ahead while walking by me, zombified. Bah, and there’s no coffee yet! I read a news report this week that a persons mood can affect others. I feel that is plain common sense but it came to mind as I headed upstairs to the server room. I hope I’m not causing crabbiness in my co-workers.

I think the main reason for my lackluster mood has to do with being spread out a little too thin. My existence has been mundane in it’s routine for the last few months. Go to work, come home, eat, study, sleep. There are a few saving graces in there, mostly of a musical kind, and they do add variety to the time in between study sessions. I’m just at the point where I really would like to get this MCSE test over with. Kudos go to me for studying material that is so completely BORING with such dedication and discipline but my head is about to burst with information that I know is half not implementable and half not important to my duties. And since so much time is spent on this, (and I admit I’m OCD and can’t focus much on other things as a result) I can’t seem to dedicate as much time to things I WANT to do, musical pursuits and such.

So, I feel I’m middling at this point. I’ve scheduled the test and am waiting to take it. And while I wait and study, it causes me to put my musical pursuits on hold. Waiting to buy Christmas presents. Waiting to develop photos from a vacation. Waiting to visit friends up North. Waiting to visit family in Europe. Waiting to get my drivers license. Waiting to get my blood work and X-ray. Waiting to get my Passport. Waiting for it to stop raining. Waiting for that baby hawk to stop screeching in the tree in my front yard. So THAT’s why I’m crabby this morning? Well, I feel a little better now, straightening that out. My test is soon so I just have to soldier on a little longer.

All good now, especially since by this time the coffee should be ready! Hmmm, hot coffee on a cold, rainy day is the best. Even with the whine of server fans in the background.

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